Saturday, 22 September 2012

Autumn Days

It's that time of year again when the aroma of stewing hips and berries and spices fills the house and every morning the children jostle to take their turn at a spoonful of the nutritious ruby syrup. This year the girl has helped me make it.

My garden gives a final harvest of the only successful above ground crop this year, thanks to the mollusc invasion we have had.

We are two weeks into the school year and we have spellings to learn. I'm not a fan of homework - certainly not at Zanders tender age so I'm trying to find gentle ways to let it into our lives. Last night we donned pyjamas, grabbed books and paper and pencils and jumped into my bed. Points to a very tired mama, it worked.


Gaia learnt to ride her bike last week and the weekend with it's blue skies and low sunshine seemed the ideal opportunity to make the most of both of them being able to use wheels! We biked through the meadows and along the river to the pub. I can't believe Gaia's little legs got her all the way there and back it must have been a good couple of miles.

We found a lane we've never ventured down before and joy of all joys it is a virtual treasure trove of blackberries, elderberries, hawes and rose hips!

Gaia is able to play Uno with us now in her own right and she has won the majority of the games she has played! It's such a fantastic way for her to really become familiar with numbers in an informal way and it's also a beautiful opportunity for Zander to proudly and tenderly share his knowledge with his little sister.

See his little skater dude look with these new shoes I pulled down from the loft? ... subtly liking a little style of his own.

Gaia started nursery this week ...

... and so my child free time is, for the foreseeable future, to be consumed by finding another job finally. This is big for me because in order to earn enough to stay afloat and get enough sleep to be a good girlfriend and mama I am going to have to ditch some irrational pride and the notion of a 'proper job' and go pull pints, stack shelves or serve coffees. I have shelved the idea of childminding I think because my house and my life are chaotic (read comfortingly messy) and whilst I am happy in comfortingly messy I haven't got the bothered at the moment to bring the house up to a standard ofsted and other parents would approve of.

Autumn rolling into town all spangly, crisp with the scent of change hails a pause for reflection and inner workings. I muse ... upon how I must know myself better in autumn than at any other time of year. It is now that I am most critical, introspective but paradoxically most inspired, most hopeful and excited too. Inspired by the words of this beautiful Mama I am going to start mapping where I want to go - inside and out, who I really want to be - now and when I grow up, how I can be this and do that - on a daily basis and in the longer term. Already the promise of this process is reminding me of forgotten dreams, dreams that I could perhaps realise sooner rather than latter.

My chaotic nature often sees dreams flutter nervously in and out of my consciousness without me pinning them down and visualising the journey, I waste too much precious time procrastinating.

There is much warming my heart I am grateful for at the moment ...

... like the children's ability to compassionately recognise a true crisis. When I awoke with a migraine I had no choice but to crawl back to bed after dragging myself downstairs to unconsciously throw cereal and milk into bowls for them. Zander tucked this under my arm as I rested and I didn't hear a peep out of them.

like their love ...

and togetherness ...

And as if it were not possible for mother nature to enchant or delight me anymore with autumn just look who Gaia spotted snuffling through a pile of felled branches in our front garden yesterday afternoon!

Tomorrow we celebrate Equinox with fire, food and friends. One thing I fervently resolve is to bring folks together more as the wheel turns instead of only wishing it always would be so.

So love, light and happiness one and all x x x


  1. love the pictures of your littles together, so heart warming to see siblings close. Makes my uterus squeal a bit ;) xx

  2. I love autumn so much. And Gaia is such a little fashionista! What a cutie.

    <3 Melissa

    1. we are so so lucky that we have been given so many clothes for her throughout her little life, so many that she is slightly 'sex and the city' in that i never see her in the exact same outfit twice! Autumn rocks, I'm giddy in love with it, blessings x